It’s too late to apologize for what you’ve done and how you’ve treated me. I can’t imagine that you would treat anyone else like that because I know that God did not put that into your soul. Your soul is beautiful, but not conservative; passionate but confused…lost, like a red and wet faced child wandering down a rural road looking for the dog they’ve grown up with. Your fascinated with pretty things that catch your attention and admire you for one reason or another. I can see why they would admire you but I can’t see why they’d stick around to see the butterfly you won’t turn into.
You gave me things I don’t want to let anyone else give me. My miscarriage was a terrible experience but I tell you…I’ve learned a thing or two from it. You’ve chased sweets while I was watching but I let you get your taste and turned a blind eye to your indulgences. I always hated it, and you knew it, but I trusted that you would change…how, my, how I wished you’d have changed.
My heart hasn’t stopped beating for the person that I knew, deep down, you’d never be. It isn’t because you don’t want to be that person – you just don’t have it in you. I am more than enough woman for you to handle; I’m too strong for your superficiality, too literal for your euphemisms, too colorful for your black & white…there is simply too much dreaming within me to accompany your general tones.
You won’t get the best of me. This is my life, my story. And I won’t take a step back for you.Thanks for all you’ve taught me. I’ve forgiven, but I’ll never forget.